Are single people in denial of their emotional detachment, commitment-phobe, or just happy with whom they are? Maybe some people don't realise that happiness just as loneliness, is a state of mind not really a state of being!
In any case I find it most bizarre (and annoying) that people think one needs to be in a couple to be complete.
Just the other night my little brother - who, whether he knows it or not is someone I admire and trust - in a very sweet and concerned manner brought up how "boring and lonely it must be (for me) to go on holiday alone! He was alluding to my holidays in Croatia a few months back!
Like everything there are several ways of looking at things... and weighing the pluses and the minuses...
It certainly comes in handy to go on holiday with someone else. Especially when the micro tripod you have for your mini camera fails to stand still long enough for you to take a photo. I am sure there are other advantages but none that I can think of now.
As for going away alone there are a few perks. For instance I don't have to worry about itineraries... I do what I want when I want it without concerning myself for what someone else may or may not want to do, see or eat. I can embrace my surroundings, lay down and relax listening to the nature around me! I've also crossed paths with interesting people albeit just for a brief moment...
To stay on the topic of my civil status, another old friend told me I was to straight forward and that I intimidate men... "not even allowing for a dependency to develop"... But I ask why would I want there to be a dependency?
It may be that I have never had that in my life (obvious dependency on my parents during the first two decades of my life not withstanding!), but I don't really like the idea of depending on someone. In many instances I have to suck it up, - 'tis after all the way we are socialised -
but where I can maintain my independence I will and that certainly true financially and even more so emotionally.
All the places I have been to and people I have met have brought me "here"... Here is at times quiet and at times hectic but certainly somewhere where I feel comfortable at all times. It feels great and superbly liberating. Just as good as skinny-dipping in the Dalmatian Coast in late summer!
Friday, 27 November 2009
Sunday, 22 November 2009
The Melting of Time
November is almost up... and it has been a peculiar month.
Looking back I can help but to appreciate the surreal aspects of the days gone by... Its like a collage. Pictures from different levels of consciousness and moments in time, MY time.
November market 20 years since the fall of the Berlin Wall and all politics aside I could not help but to think at how happy people where to be reunited with loved ones. Indeed there are some bonds that the tyranny of certain ideas of man cannot destroy. If only we didn't suffer from A.D.D. and managed to hold on to the things that bring us together rather than on those that pulls us apart...
Silly as it may seem to some as a follow on paragraph, we also lost one of our family dogs this month... Pitou it all the way from Zambia... travelled more than many people have in a life time! He was a funny dog, when he was feeling lazy you could not get him to come towards you if you tried but if he was across the house from the kitchen and heard a bag of bread being opened he'd be in front of you wagging his tail like there is no tomorrow!
November was also a bit of a funny month when it came to "romance". Following my amorous affair in October, the Silver Surfer got in touch. We met in late September at an alumni event which ended up turning into an ad hoc dinner - with some curve balls thrown into the mix.
Since then there have been a few dates: a dinner and a country walk both of which included one of his "younger" sisters and a friend of hers in town for a few days. Then there was a folk music concert followed a few weeks later by a classical music recital. This late date marked a chance of pace. He finally dared to take my hand in his! His MO is somewhat different from that of others I've come across in the past... Kissing still feels clumsy but hopefully that is not due to lack of know-how! With a 20+ year difference I would surely hope not in any case!
Several 'game theory-like' scenarios where considered, some "win-win" others "win-lose" and feelings of being over my head have somewhat subsided, which is never easy for over-analytical control freak! This should be an interesting episode...
I've never really been a fan of Dali, but you gotta love the surreal touches in life's collage...
Looking back I can help but to appreciate the surreal aspects of the days gone by... Its like a collage. Pictures from different levels of consciousness and moments in time, MY time.
November market 20 years since the fall of the Berlin Wall and all politics aside I could not help but to think at how happy people where to be reunited with loved ones. Indeed there are some bonds that the tyranny of certain ideas of man cannot destroy. If only we didn't suffer from A.D.D. and managed to hold on to the things that bring us together rather than on those that pulls us apart...
'tis weird how in life the profound and the mundane are so intrinsically entwined ...
Silly as it may seem to some as a follow on paragraph, we also lost one of our family dogs this month... Pitou it all the way from Zambia... travelled more than many people have in a life time! He was a funny dog, when he was feeling lazy you could not get him to come towards you if you tried but if he was across the house from the kitchen and heard a bag of bread being opened he'd be in front of you wagging his tail like there is no tomorrow!
Time: we choose whether passes us by or whether it leaves in us memories of a life lived!
November was also a bit of a funny month when it came to "romance". Following my amorous affair in October, the Silver Surfer got in touch. We met in late September at an alumni event which ended up turning into an ad hoc dinner - with some curve balls thrown into the mix.
Since then there have been a few dates: a dinner and a country walk both of which included one of his "younger" sisters and a friend of hers in town for a few days. Then there was a folk music concert followed a few weeks later by a classical music recital. This late date marked a chance of pace. He finally dared to take my hand in his! His MO is somewhat different from that of others I've come across in the past... Kissing still feels clumsy but hopefully that is not due to lack of know-how! With a 20+ year difference I would surely hope not in any case!
Several 'game theory-like' scenarios where considered, some "win-win" others "win-lose" and feelings of being over my head have somewhat subsided, which is never easy for over-analytical control freak! This should be an interesting episode...
I've never really been a fan of Dali, but you gotta love the surreal touches in life's collage...
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